4th Birthday Wish coming in late!

Dear Gautam,

I’m sorry for not writing this before. All of our lives have changed since I was here last. 2024 was a good year for all of us. Your father and I were able to start our very own little Bistro called Loam. And you were very much part of the team! Your little sister, Gauri, arrived on October 14th 2024, exactly a month before your birthday. Even though we were all still settling down into our new roles, you as a big brother, we managed to squeeze in a warm birthday party for you at our home. You had fun and I’m glad for it. I hope you understand that I did not write this before or around your Birthday, as I usually do, because I wanted to take time to phrase out what I want for you this year. This is important for me, and I hope it is meaningful to you in the future.

Bubba, at 4 years old, your imagination is thriving. You live in a colourful world and hear music all around you. Keeping on with the trend, a few songs you have learnt by heart are Both sides now by Joni Mitchell, We are the Champions by Queen, and Circle of Life from the Lion King. You are fascinated by the Boradway version of Lion King and went to school yesterday with your face painted as Rafiqui. Freddie Mercury is somewhat your icon. It seems you have a flair for performance. You’re coming into your self, little one. Both Dadda and I are so proud of you.

The last year however, has not been a bed of roses for you. Life has already presented its first set of challenges. The preschool you were attending started pressuring you into reading, and you were not ready. You switched off. It was difficult for Dadda and I to watch you struggle. We felt that the system would fail you, and therefore, we pulled you out. You attend this beautiful Montessori now called Flourish, and that is what you are doing there- Flourishing. You are working and learning at a pace that suits you. You’re slowly picking up alphabet and numbers, all on your own. We have left you in charge. That’s as far as the start of your academic journey is concerned.

As far as the physicality is concerned, you are behind. It’s not your fault. It’s in your genes. While I am confident that you will pick up your pace academically, because you are fairly clever, I’m not so confident that you will push yourself physically. So I have taken it upon myself to push you forward.

The reason is this- I see a competitive streak in you. I see that you do not want to lose, and yet when you do, you stop trying. You’re escaping. Bubba, I will not let you. Dadda and I have your back. Trust me. As long as it is my job to instill in you the confidence to keep trying despite failure, I will constantly be at it. I will be at it because at some point, I was in your position. I wanted to win. I wish someone had pushed me when I was little. Please do not misunderstand this to mean that I want you to achieve certain accolades or want you to win medals. Not at all. But I do want you to be strong and healthy. That is a non-negotiable. I know you might hate me for pushing you to wake up in the morning, to bend, to stretch. Being tough on you does not come easy to me. And the funny part is that I don’t know discipline myself. I will have to learn for you, and I will. I promise you that.

The gist of it is that both Dadda and I are confident that you do not belong in any system. The values that we want to instill- discipline, excellence, confidence, humility, courage, health and love for learning-all of these do not come from an institution. We hope for you that these values come from within, as you discover your own wonders, and carve out your way in this world. On our part, we will always be by your side as you fall, and pick yourself up again, and again and again. For as long as it takes.

Now to put all this in perspective, let me tell you a little about myself. I am a creature of doubt, just the opposite of confidence. I wish I weren’t, but that is how I have turned out. I do not want to pass on that to you. So raising you in the manner described above, to let you be free to be you, with conviction, is a battle I fight with myself everyday. If on a few days I falter, and rush you to learn your ABCs or 123s or write or whatever it is that 4 year olds going to traditional schools do, please forgive me. It’s just my concern for you getting the better of me. Forgive me for it and thrive on your own. And this year, I will pray to the Universe to help me be the right resource for you, and do justice to who you are and can become.

Love forever,

Mamma

https://photos.app.goo.gl/X3HYrrneou3x9NNF7

https://photos.app.goo.gl/Awsnqz5K3iDQpfVE7

https://photos.app.goo.gl/sm8FexJsUwhfB9J19

https://photos.app.goo.gl/4RKaNWZUdFCvXD6H8

https://photos.app.goo.gl/T7cEDu5ZoruxwEcv5

https://photos.app.goo.gl/MxMgCKNtQjMneA4H8

https://photos.app.goo.gl/XQRyBtiFaSiZjL3R8

https://photos.app.goo.gl/ZBTF2j4kvrovE4vb9

https://photos.app.goo.gl/MXtEYU7RGdcemD3H7

https://photos.app.goo.gl/NqB5YxdAPTwZD81A7